April 8, 2024
Being competitive: Is it good? Is it bad?
I think there are a lot of different ways that people look at competitiveness. Even just dwelling on it right now I can come up with an example where competitiveness can be good, and when it can be harmful. I wanted to go on a little stream of consciousness journey as I think about it. Come with me!
First, I would immediately describe myself as not incredibly competitive. But what do I mean by that? I'll find an answer to that by the end of this rambling. What does 'being competitive' even represent?
By definition, according to Wikipedia, "Competition is a rivalry where two or more parties strive for a common goal which cannot be shared: where one's gain is the other's loss".
Right away, this definition implies that by being competitive, there is going to be a winner and a loser. I think that a lot of people in the equestrian competition industry understand that at a show, there will be a winner of each class or division, and then everyone else 'loses', per se. Of course we tend not to view 'not winning' as 'losing' in most equestrian sport, because there are personal victories that are different for each rider along the way. (The same can be said about a lot of sports, but given my experiences I will only be speaking to horse sport, specifically eventing!)
Eventing is such a cool sport in that way, where there are chances to 'be the best' and walk away with the blue ribbon, but there are also plenty of other ways to find 'wins' for yourself and for your horse. There was one show a few years back where I was technically eliminated on cross country because I missed a jump, but the horse I was riding at the time and I had the most in-sync show jumping round to date right before cross country that I literally could not have cared less about being eliminated out on xc. I was so happy with our performance in the stadium ring, as that had been our weak link together to that point. In another similar instance, I remember walking off of the cross country course after mine and Sophie's first prelim absolutely beaming because we did it! We didn't win - we were far from it - but for me that day, success was finishing on a number, not a letter, and that we did. It was an added bonus that we finished in the ribbons! On paper it wasn't pretty; we had a less than stellar dressage, one rail in stadium, and then two problems cross country plus time, but from the riding perspective I was delighted. The cross country issues we had were both related to distractions near the jump, not the jumps themselves, and Sophie still had room for more 'go' as we crossed through the flags. It made me feel like it wasn't insane for us to have had a go at the level.
I find myself thinking that way a lot - about things not looking good 'on paper'. I know it comes from me knowing that I have an audience, and I want to perform well so that there is no wrongful assumptions or judgement based on my scores. I am sure that I am not the only rider to feel this way. I have been trying to focus on myself and how I feel about my own performances versus how others might perceive them, but it's hard! I too will find myself stalking event entries' live scoring feature for friends, and even looking at how the pros are doing. I always want to know how things went and can't help but ask myself 'what happened?' if I see certain things pop up on their scores - so I know full well that I am part of the problem as to why I worry about 'good on paper'. 😅
However, at the end of the day, I remind myself that stuff doesn't matter. What matters is whatever is important in your mind with regards to what you want to accomplish with your horse.
I have ridden with a lot of riders with varied levels of competitiveness. For some, they want to win it all. For others, they want to be able to travel to and compete at all the big, beautiful venues. Some just want to get a professional photo where they are smiling over a jump instead of sporting a terrible resting face. For others still, they want to be able to finish an event on a number and not a letter. I even know someone who works with all sorts of young and green horses and for her, she wants to be able to give the horse a positive experience at one or all three phases, even if it means they end up being eliminated.
I think a better way of viewing someone's competitive nature is discovering what their drive is. What drives them to be successful? Is it getting to the podium? Is it qualifying for a certain show? Is it finishing anywhere in the ribbons? Is it taking a youngster on their first outings and creating good experiences? Is it coming back home with a horse that is still sound?
If someone's drive is to win it all at the expense of their horse, or is putting others down in the process of getting to their goal, that is a problem. If someone's drive is to win it all and take the care and health of their horse as paramount to get to that point, then that's great! Even better if they are lifting others up along the way. I think that it's one thing to have the ambition to move up the levels and win it all by doing it in a careful, planned, horse-first way, rather than a blind race to the top 'just because' and focusing more on peers' performances first. It's not inherently bad to focus on your fellow competitors, but I think a lot of people can get blinded by feeling the need to always be the best that they might lose sight of what is key at the heart of this sport: the horse! A professional I worked for had big goals to be at the top of the sport, and was always striving to be better for herself, her owners, and eventing as a whole, but she cared about nothing more than the happiness and health of her horses. She loved the sport, but she also loved them. And, even better, she also had a lot of love for her fellow professionals and competitors. Her goals and season plans reflected that. It was refreshing to learn that this is fairly common at the upper levels.
I know that there is a mindset that is unfortunately common these days, especially with younger or newer riders to the sport, that there is this unspoken race to be the first one to get to the higher levels. I think this type of competitive mindset can foster toxicity amongst those newer to the sport, because it takes away from why we start to do this in the first place - because we love the animal and because it is fun to event.
When I think of what drives me, I have found that it changes depending on my situation. Currently, with Sophie, I am driven to achieve certain MER's (minimum eligibility requirements) in order to qualify to compete at a specific show that I would like to enter. If you're curious about what MER's are and if you need to achieve a certain amount for a level that you are shooting for, check this Rule Refresher from USEA. For a long time, my big goal was to get to the prelim level, and according to USEA's rules, we needed 6 MER's at training or higher to get there.
[For context, the six MER's had to be performances at training or modified level at USEA recognized shows where your results consisted across the board of: a dressage score of less than 45 penalty points, no more than 16 penalty points in show jumping, no jumping penalties at cross country fences and no more than 75 seconds over time on cross country. These are put in place as an effort to maintain safety within the sport. It's honestly a bunch of goals rolled into one! Read the article at the link for more info!]
With all of that in mind, my first goal was to focus on feeling confident at training and modified as a stepping stone to the long term plan. We achieved that goal, and then we achieved my goal of going prelim shortly thereafter, and I am so proud of both. In the last year, we spent a few moments back at training to make sure we are still comfortable and confident, and have made plans to move back up. I am happy to move back down and coast at training if we end up not making it work at the upper levels again (because there are ALWAYS other little goals I can set for us within the level to still work on being competitive with myself), but at the discretion of my coach, and how confident both Sophie and myself feel, and for meeting all MER's and then some, I believe we are ready for the next move back up.
After we hopefully get to that point, I am not sure what my next driving factor will be. I can honestly say that as much as winning is nice, I am not driven by the blue ribbon. At least not right now. I am absolutely self-focused, and driven for personal bests and competing with myself and not bests in comparison to others.
Now me typing that out makes me sound all high and mighty, but it is only because I know full well that Sophie and I are not in a position right now to waltz in and beat everyone, so I won't even attempt to set that kind of expectation for us!! We're just not THAT good 😂 Dressage is our most challenging phase, and our performances have often placed us towards the middle or bottom of the pack. Another consistent goal of mine is to work on our relaxation and suppleness at venues away from home so that we can improve our scores in the sandbox. We often have solid rides in the jumping phases that have historically moved us up in the placings by the end of the day, but our flat work has yet to put us at the top from the get go. Maybe one day I will feel like our performance in all three phases is such that we should always be striving to win, but that is definitely not the current case. I also don't have plans to shoot for the olympics with Sophie, so us winning and getting our name out there is not something I need to push us to do. I care more about feeling confident and having fun while we are out there. Sophie is my only horse, and she has a forever home with me, so I am setting our goals one at a time and just seeing where the tide takes us. If we can't reach our current goal, then so be it, and I will find other goals and drives for us.
One other thing I wanted to touch upon is how we as riders can be each other's strength as we all navigate our own goals and reasons to be competitive. How can we do that?
Help celebrate other's successes, no matter how they compare to your ideas of success.
Congratulate the winner as well as everyone else in your class on a good ride when you can
Wish each other good luck and good rides in passing.
Avoid talking smack about other riders, especially the ones you know nothing about behind the scenes.
Learn how the winners win, particularly at the big shows! Watch their competition videos when you can, and hear about what they do to get to where they are. Especially those names you are always seeing at the top - there's a reason that they are there, and there is always something to learn from even if they are competing at levels you never see yourself getting to.
Try really hard to find little victories along the way. Is your horse sound and happy? That alone is a huge win.
Most importantly, try to set reasonable and achievable goals. Or at least organize goals into short term versus long term. If you only set one lofty goal, the more likely you are to be disappointed when you aren't getting there. It doesn't mean you never will - it just might be so far away that you forget other wins that could happen along the way to it!
Are you having trouble finding an appropriate goal on your eventing journey that isn't just 'I want to move up to the next level'? Here are a few competition goals I have set for myself over the years for shows that you can use to brain storm where is a good place to start - and none of these have to do in comparison to others, they are all personal goals you can set and work on being competitive with yourself:
Improve my dressage score by a point or two from one show to the next (at the same level)
More specifically, improve centerlines to be straighter, or circles (any dressage geometry) to be more accurate
Take the suppleness and relaxation we can find at home and create it at shows
Finish cross country within the optimum time
Jump all the jumps on cross country the first attempt
Knock one rail or less in show jumping
Or, generally go clear show jumping
Have a really rhythmic, consistent canter throughout a show jumping course
Finish an event on a number and not a letter
Achieve my required MER's for moving up to the next level over the span of one or two seasons (depending on situation and timing)
Watch back a video of my dressage test and notice a visible difference in my shoulders from previous shows (sitting further back and not so much tipping)
Watch back a video of either jumping phase and notice a visible difference in the level of pulling to slow down (using my seat and upper body more than my arms)
Coming home with a horse that is sound, fit, and happy
Finishing an event and having my horse show that they are clearly fit for the level (not dying as we cross the flags, still having some more in the tank)
Coming back with all the studs still in place
Not losing any shoes on course!
Remembering my dressage test
Having good form (and not making a bad face) over any jumps that are photo ops (silly but real! 😂 )
Not going off course in the jumping phases
Remembering to smile in each phase because I do, in fact, love doing this sport
...the goals could be endless!
I enjoy setting and working towards goals. Being competitive with yourself can help you work harder to be better without worrying about others. Due to my limited time available and also having only one horse, I set goals that are reasonable given my current situation. If we can't achieve the goals I have set for us right now, I will suck it up and either find a new route to get there or edit my plans entirely. I also consult my trainer for advice on my goals and if she thinks they are reasonable and achievable.
I am thinking so much about goals in the context of competition because having a goal is helpful to give a rider direction, but it also can foster competitiveness in a way that drives a rider to be better and work a little harder in order to achieve said goals. And it does that in a way where you don't have to think about being 'better' than anyone else - just yourself!
So to answer my original question, when it comes to talking about myself and me 'not being incredibly competitive', I think I mean that I am not competing with others often. I am usually competing with past Sophie and Kailyn, and trying to continue improving and getting better for myself. Like I said previously, at some point I might feel that I can step into a show feeling like I am at a place where I could successfully compete with others and focus on bringing home the blue, but that's for another day.
In summary, I think that competitiveness needs context when you are thinking about whether you or another might be competitive. Why might they be or why might they not be that competitive? What is your definition of 'competitiveness'? What drives you or that rider to be successful? It is different for every rider, and I think it is something you should chat about with your peers. It is inspiring to learn what might drive one rider versus another. Remember that even if it is different, I can near-guarantee that at the base level, we all are simply just delighted to be able to do something as incredible as eventing with these wonderful horses.
No matter what we might be aiming for, I always look forward to any time I get to be in that saddle and behind the ears of the spotted unicorn!
A reminder that this blog post is less of a fully planned and thought out post, and more of just a dump of my thoughts on this topic. If it feels a little disjointed, that is because of how my brain was operating as I was going through this - lol!
Do you have thoughts on this topic? Feel free to leave a comment, send me a message, or contact me on my socials. I love chatting with likeminded riders!
K
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